I have a Lego-Hand 🫴.
I slit my vital right lifeline (cue dramatic music), while killing¹ off the ribbon fish Dad had delivered in between my Natal Chart readings with a colleague I had invited home for banana bread earlier in the afternoon. “Ouf, what a stringy sequence of events.” I hear you; stay put, shows on.
So was born the Lego-Hand, or as Dad calls it, the Queen’s Wave².
Interlude: How to Clean Ribbon Fish
Armed with a pair of heavy-duty Korean kitchen shears, I made two diagonal cuts behind the head down to the gills, then sliced the belly open starting from the vent hole (the one stained yellow). With one firm tug, the head came away cleanly, taking the membrane and the entire track of innards with it. Perfect! All that remained was using the blade’s edge to scrape away the silver, paste-like scales.
Just as I gripped the slimy torso, the fish got its revenge: its sharp fin sliced right across my palm. As the dirty water seeped into the cut, a sharp sting flared up, and I genuinely thought the fish had poisoned me as its final strike!
DUN DUN DUNNN!
I rushed to rinse with water, then applied Povidone-iodine, which had expired in 2020, as if that made any difference³. Thankfully, no blood appeared, otherwise I would’ve fainted right there. As it turned out, the fin had only grazed the surface of my thick skin, leaving a scratch—a mere centimeter wide and a millimeter deep. “Phew.”
Like every other time I hurt a leg, arm, or hand, I see the importance of having all four limbs intact and (a brain) fully functional.
Things I have trouble with a Lego-Hand:
- swiping on my iPhone Pro Max, which is already difficult with my small hands
- opening water bottles and air-tight jars
- pressing Function, Option, and Delete to forward delete entire words
- pressing space while deleting cuz I type fast and carelessly
- cooking, washing, or wiping with dirty cloths (yay)
- putting on a face mask (oh no)
- holding onto a pickleball racket (I can imagine)
- washing my hair
Footnotes
- In Chinese we say 殺 (kill) for preparing fish, watermelon or pineapple.
- It’s a real thing, The Royal Wave
- This is not medical advice on treating cuts.