Over time, I’ve heard comments from those returning home after graduation that made me question whether they were joking, exaggerating, or unintentionally causing second-hand embarrassment. I decided to make a list.
Mostly because I wonder if I’ve ever accidentally projected that same tone-deafness, something my parents worked hard to prevent by ensuring my brother and I fully absorbed both ends of the cultures we grew up in.
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“My fingers have gradually forgotten how chopsticks work.” — From someone who eats at home 70% of the time.
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“Using your phone in public is overrated; no one should be scrolling while walking.” — Concluded while comparing cities with phone-snatchers and pickpockets to the streets here, or say Tokyo.
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“Picnic culture only exists in places where people treat parks like beaches.” — You’ve not witnessed what t and I have in the parks here.
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“Dairy milk is unhealthy; non-dairy options like oat or almond milk are superior.” — Meanwhile, soy milk has never felt trendier.
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“Thrifting is so cool.” — Interesting, considering people called me cheap when I did it back in high school.
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“I don’t care how much people stare at me here when I dress revealingly.” — People will always stare if you have great style.
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“There’s just so much culture—music and art—in this city. I’m going to have trouble finding like-minded friends if I go home.” — Genuinely felt uncultured to even comment.
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“Walking home at midnight never felt safe, not even back home.” — You’ve probably not hung out past 12 here, not to mention living in the heart of a city where the streetlights are never off.
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“There are subway stations every couple of blocks! Public transit is just so much more convenient and runs all night.” — There are also YouBike stations on every street corner operating 24/7.
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“Books are so much cheaper over there.” — Get a free Eslite membership; I swear reading one book a month is already way above average.
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“I can’t bake or cook at home.” — As if baking was ever a genuine interest.
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“I don’t understand why my hometown friends claim I barely hang out with them; I just came out for hot pot!” — Well, it’s not hard to see through the distancing.
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“It’s hard to travel around, or go to another country on a whim.” — Mostly from those who’ve not explored even the tips of this island.
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“There is no beauty in this city or pretty boys.” — I’d have to agree, partially.
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“The simplest happiness comes from getting blueberries from the farmers market and eating them on the bench.” - We get them in bulk from Costco; does that count?
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“The weather’s wet outside, but I am dry inside.” - Hard to tell if it was in a literal sense or lack of love life in this humidity. I made a funny remark, but wasn’t well received.
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“Climbing the career ladder was something conditioned back at home; here, I began to ask myself why work harder when the salary’s decent and I’m happy (with the job) overall.” — Concluded after expressing discontent over feeling excluded by locals due to inherent social differences, and simply not buying a drink. I guess happiness is also contextual.
Jokes aside, I do sympathize with these comments—the performative effort to wear a specific identity like a wolf skin, or to cling to a place merely visited or briefly lived in. I certainly have done the same, intentionally or not.
But having lived in one city for the majority of my life, somewhere some say a complete opposite of my persona, language, and cultural interests, strangers sometimes still question whether I am an alien. I always answer no, and they know it’s true based on how much I appreciate my surroundings, the way I live and interact.
We can’t escape the roots that shaped us, so why not embrace them in a way we naturally would, even if things have changed on the surface.